How many days does it take to build a new habit?
(This is from Edition 47 of The Upleveler, our weekly smartletter)
Some say the answer is 21. Some say it is 66.
In his book 'Atomic Habits', author James Clear says it's not even about the number of days, but the number of repetitions you put into your habit routine.
In our own experience, there is no one golden number, and the answer is the dreaded 'it depends''.
However, the belief that a habit can be constructed in 'n' days by itself can be powerful. If you are convinced that you need at least 21 days before demanding to see results, you've bought yourself time and mental support to build a system.
One of our readers, Rasika Wakodkar, sent us a personal story that has many of our pet topics: habits, reflection, and connecting the dots. Our smartletter even plays a minor part in it! Read it below.
And think about this: What can you try doing for 21 days?
"How I taught myself to stand and stare"
Rasika Wadodkar is a professional content writer, editor, and communications specialist. She loves a good conversation, walking in nature and reading stories to children.
I had no clue about Maxwell Maltz’s theory that it takes at least 21 days to form a habit. I simply clicked a link in a newsletter, little knowing this stroke of serendipity would result in an epiphany! Because just then, something had happened that made me relook at my ways and nudged me to build a new habit…
…but let me begin at the beginning.
Leading up to 21 days
Last month, during our morning walk, my friend pointed out a gorgeous peepal tree, resplendent despite the summer sun. I had totally missed this wondrous sight! The next morning, I saw the tree had a twin – in a shade of lighter green. Their beauty hit me with a bang. As did the sad realization that I had been walking this same route daily but had never seen these stunning trees nor their intricate web of branches nor the deep blue sky above them.
That same day, I clicked open a new issue of The Upleveler. That’s where I read the piece about new habits and the 21 days connection. It was like a cosmic sign! I said to myself that I had to change my unseeing nature. I resolved to spot, stop and stare at the beautiful sights in my surroundings – for the next 21 days. These 21 days, I hoped, would build in me a lifelong habit of being mindful of the wonderful Nature abundant around me.
The journey of the 21 days
With this resolve, I kicked off my 21-day project Stand&Stare. I was enthused about my morning walks as they provided max scope to be amidst Nature. Flowers and leaves and birds and barks ended up as my WhatsApp status – where I shared my story. “Love it!” “Super-like!” “Gorgeous!” I marked the end of the first week, high on the comments gushing in.
The sights were still breath-taking, but the photos dwindled from 5 to 6 a day to 2 or 3. As the mercury soared high, I dreaded walking. Completing 5 kilometres was an uphill task, let alone mustering up the eagerness to be attentive and spot something beautiful every single day.
My journey to create a lifelong habit had hit a low. A seaside holiday and the glorious sight of the red-and-orange-hued Sun rising over the Bay of Bengal provided a shot of energy. My status stories flowed again…
Observation to perception
Gradually, I realized I was moving beyond pursuing the activity of my habit to developing a thought pattern around it. I discovered in myself a perception to not only observe the sights in Nature, but also recognize their underlying messages. The dried brown foliage alongside the freshly green indicated co-existence. A lone bird staring out into the sea reminded me to take a quiet moment. And the strong tree trunks were reminiscent of those who root for me.
These analogies gained pertinence. As I neared the end of 21 days, I found myself consciously exploring such intrinsic meanings – eager to learn life lessons in this outdoor classroom.
21 days later
I’m proud to say my gaze now naturally zooms in on that flower blooming among a thatch of thorns. Or the dried flower that’s holding tight to its stalk. I no longer need to keep my eyes peeled. The struggle to spot the beautiful is replaced by an effortless calm…because the habit has successfully taken root.
It wasn’t a smooth ride. I encountered “logistical” problems – frequent migraines that prevented me from stepping out or bad-photo days when I couldn’t spot anything new. On such days, I stared at the hills from my terrace, but resorted to backup photos to stay on schedule.
Identifying my objective – which happened only toward the end – is what cemented it. Knowing why I was doing what I was doing gave my habit a purpose. I was craving to not hurry, to be mindful, and to build calm within me. Standing and staring at Nature helped me create my oasis in the midst of the everyday frenzy, and I will continue doing that for many more 21 days.
Get into the habit of reading such interesting pieces. Subscribe to The Upleveler!